Dax didn't want to go to just any church. He wanted to go to the church that that girl Michelle helped, once upon a time. He was certain if they crossed paths again, then Michelle wouldn't worry so much about him. He guessed.
Dax knew Michelle could do better. She should be with someone better. What was he to do?
The old Dax would have shown her his true colors, already. Maybe if he had, well, he'd been history. But he wanted to change. Although, he guessed he hadn't when he saw that look on Tess' face when she saw him peering into the children's corner at the library.
"What are you doing here?" She stopped what she was doing, putting the children's new books out. She was all perky and happy until she saw him. Immediately, she gave him an ugly look as if she'd call the police if he lingered here long.
"I didn't come to see you." He might have been blunt, but it was the truth. "Honestly, I didn't."
"Really?" She was still indifferent.
"So..so how have you been?" He gazed at her simple mauve sweater set and her pencil skirt. His eyes kept staring at the chunky leather earth shoes she wore. He then saw she was wearing black rimmed glasses. A real librarian, he guessed. But maybe that was an engagement ring, he spotted. No wedding band yet.
"Good. And you?" She wouldn't let a smile slip. He understood.
"Fine." He'd make it short. There was nothing to say. Not now. Not ever. Even if he did want to tell her he didn't think of her at all now.
"So what do you want?" She talked as if he wasn't telling her the truth, instead of being helpful customer service.
"Its nothing. I-I thought maybe..." He didn't know how to talk about this. Wasn't like he was out shopping for a kid for Michelle.
"Maybe what?" She looked at him that he needed to make this quick even if there was no one waiting to check out.
"I have this friend who wants to be a foster parent." He guessed that was a start.
"Its not you, is it? Because, right now, I could tell you..you have no business with a kid." She was being pissy Tess now. Not that girl who liked more than drinking coffee with him. Who was she then? He had to wonder. Maybe she was the one with the personality problem. Not him, but he wouldn't bring it up.
"No," He winced as if he might have a good laugh. "I'd never want to be a Dad." But he knew that wasn't true. Deep down, that's all he'd ever wanted. Especially, with Tess. He wanted her to be his home. His life. But that was freaking crazy now.
"Good." She seemed a little more at ease now. "Is it Michelle?"
Dax thought he might choke. He nodded. Tess told him everything he needed to know about the girl and where she went to church.