Tuesday, February 13, 2024

All the Things We Should Have Done



 "Fuck," Stevie winced with a swelled frown. Just how long had he been out? Wasn't he supposed to be at the Preschool center? He felt as if he'd slept a year or so and there was  J sacked out next to him as the sun poured in.

Yes, maybe they needed this. Hibernation after a miserable time. There were other things he knew he should be thinking about instead of Holly.

At the moment, he didn't like her very much. She'd taken up way too much of his time. Especially, his time with J. He sat up and blinked. Was the bad stuff really over?

Instantly, he fell back on his pillow. What about Tim?

Finally, it was rewinding back in his head about what his mother had said. "Tim is dead."

He winced tears. No. No that wasn't true. He did not remember any of it. Of course, he'd been in a coma then too. He didn't even have a clue what led up to it. It was like Tim just ignored him, playing so hard to get. Stevie didn't know what to do.

He sighed. Funny, Holly was in a coma too. Had he been that testy?

He didn't remember. It wasn't supposed to be that way. 

The tears emerged. He couldn't stop it as hard as he winced his eyes. At first, the tears were so warm but instantly became cold. 

Finally, he managed to get in his sleep pants, tank, and fuzzy slippers. It wasn't until he got to the kitchen that he noticed the coffee was on and there was his mom reading one of her trashy romances and sipping black coffee.

"I'm not making breakfast," she informed him without looking up. She reminded him it was Sunday and it was the perfect day to sleep in. She mentioned the weather. It might look sunny, but it was deceiving. Frost was still on the windshield of his car. He noticed as he peaked between the blinds in the front window of the livingroom.

Stevie nodded and went to make a feast with his black coffee with milk and sugar. It was lukewarm by the time he got the concoction ready and seated across from her in their open kitchen.

"I don't remember, Mom." He looked at her as if she needed to give him details.

"Well, you smoke too much," she pointed out his bad habits. He was still a pothead in her book.

"Mom, I don't smoke," he winced back. "J isn't like that, you know."

She nodded. She still believed J might be Tim. "But he's dead, you know."

"We don't know for sure," Stevie told her. It felt as if his presence faded into the wind. He almost felt comfortable talking about him. Nevertheless, there had been a car crash on the bridge and Tim might have gotten washed away in the Missouri River.

"But..but I wasn't driving. I didn't do the driving," he insisted. "Especially, in..in somebody else's car."

These were the facts. His mother remained unchanged. It was then he did wonder if he'd grown since then. He knew he wouldn't have thought so until he met J.

Monday, February 20, 2023

Thinking you might be in perfect sync if they would only shut up




 "It really is OK to be selfish some of the time," J assured Stevie. "You can't just think about Holly night and day."

J wished Stevie would stop dwelling about how it was supposed to be for Holly and Carrie.

"Maybe...Carrie is better off with Tobey." There it was said, he could go on with brushing his teeth and hoping somebody got the hint they were to do something else instead of talking about their so called friends.

"What?" Stevie gave him the eye, as if how could he say such things. Oh, he edged in at the bathroom mirror then and went to the face oil as if he'd be fifteen forever when in fact he was well into his twenties now. After all, J only smiled at the thought, his little drama queen.

"Well, maybe they'll get together one day, but Holly isn't all that mature yet and she still needs a lot taking care of. Would you want Carrie slaving over her?"

"Well...no." Stevie slathered the oil and stroked his neck as if that was the first sign of aging. J just watched. He was still thinking, evidently about Tobey and Carrie.

"You don't think they ...are..doing anything...do you?" He gave J a sharp look as if Tobey gave him a tell all.

"He's never told me anything," J squinted after he squished his mouth with water.

"I bet he was in love with her brother," Stevie noted.

"Not everyone is as horny as you and me," J turned to him. 

"But it could have happened," Stevie said.

"Can we stop talking about them now?" J didn't know what else to do but to shut Stevie up with a kiss. Naturally, that changed things with minty breaths and freshly washed skin. One robe peeled off and then the other. Thank God, the bathroom was in their room. It might have been a small bathroom, but things could still happen, and they did. Hopefully, by tomorrow morning Stevie was only dreaming of J and not wondering if they had or they hadn't with Tobey and Carrie.


Saturday, February 11, 2023

Last raindrop

 


Carrie wanted to be happy, but there was a matter with her brother. He was barely alive.

"I don't know how he made it this far," Liam (Toby) said about the matter. "Honestly, it's like a miracle."

She guessed it was. Maybe. There were indifferent feelings she felt about her brother. Still, she wondered just how much longer this would last. Would he be in this state, permanently?

And Holly was still thawing out, or so it felt that way. Holly was going to be OK. Only, she didn't remember anything.

Carrie tried her best not to give up. Not to say anything, but it was really taking a toll on her. Of course, she still worked at the nail salon. She couldn't just stay at the hospital by anybody's side.

"We'll get through this," Liam was optimistic. Sort of. He'd be smiling one minute and then she could see him falling apart too. 

Naturally, Holly was like a hurt bird. Squawking and angry with everyone. Carrie didn't know exactly how to respond. Of course, Holly was mad that she wasn't here to take care of her. She was wheelchair-bound at the moment. Although, the doctors said she could walk ...if she wanted to.

"Do you think she's punishing me?" Carrie wanted to know when she and Laim were home alone.

"Possibly," Liam shrugged. She thought he was a good judge of character. Of course, it was just the two of them.

"Should we bring her here?" She felt foolish to ask. They might never survive if they did. 

He shook his head no. "She's got a family." 

Of course, Carrie had never met them. Yes, it was time to let them take over until Holly was better. However, it made her wracked with guilt, and maybe Liam was in the same boat in an ocean of misery about the circumstances with her brother. 

Life was going on and the only way to keep moving forward was to be there for each other. Still, Carrie was waiting for Holly to come back like hell on wheels.

Saturday, February 4, 2023

I'm breakin' cause I miss you so much



 Stevie was afraid J might never come back, even if it was just twenty-four hours.

"Twenty-four hours of  hell!" Stevie told him. He couldn't take his eyes off his significant other. Didn't he know the bed was like ice without him? He took to J like he'd just come back from the war. His fingers touched both sides of his jawline and he pulled J in as if he was the one who need to be resisted. It was breathless as much as it was infectious. One kiss after another. Stevie forgot they were even at the hospital. 

He finally broke away for a moment and looked at J again. Was it really him? What was wrong with his hair. "It's dark." Stevie couldn't even blink. "How did that happen?"

"Oh, we were going incognito." J practically laughed as he looked down at Stevie as if he was so glad to be back with him, no less.

"What? It's a wig?" Stevie winced. It was so absurd. Maybe even out of the ordinary. What had Tobes done to him? Although, Stevie knew he couldn't ask. He wouldn't. After all they were just ex-roommates. Still he wondered if Tobes was some other kind of EX too.

"You must be hungry," Stevie grabbed his hand. They could go to the cafeteria and wait for news about Holly who might have some kind of frost bite. She was still practically unconscious at times. There was so much Stevie didn't know and J didn't have any answers either. 

Stevie looked back, Tobes was sitting with Carrie. He was consoling her as he patted her back and then hugged her close.

"What's that about?" Stevie wondered what he'd missed. They walked back down the shiney corridor to where they were.

"It was Carrie's brother," Tobes told them.

Stevie looked to J wondering what this could mean.

Sunday, January 29, 2023

I am not a villian

 



She couldn't fight it anymore. Yes, several times, she thought she got up and got away. But she would awake sluggishly and knew it wasn't so. Holly might as well have melted into the bed, but it was frozen now.

Her teeth chattered, yet that soon ended too. No movement at all. Nothing. In the vastness, she'd explored each corner of the room. Even after the lights went out. Yes, there was the reflection of the snow outside and it made everything a dark gray.

Why was it taking .... so long? She'd screamed in silence but no one was there. No one, but the body kept her pinned to the bed. It was dead weight and then the word DEAD made her spazz even more. Yes, for hours on end she kept calming herself. 

There was the moment she thought she made it to the bathroom. She couldn't find the commode. It had been locked away. Of course, she remembered someone saying, "You don't have to go to the bathroom, anymore."

She cried herself into oblivion. It seemed as if the end would never get here.

And then the door flung open. But it was a jet of cold that made her body tremble, even if it actually couldn't. She heard voices. She didn't know. 

"No, you're not supposed to know." He'd said. "You have to forget everything." She promised that she would.




"Shady Pines," J didn't know if he should be laughing or thinking they might be in an episode of an old TV show. It was snowing again. and each room was a separate cabin of the motel in a maze of pines.

"It looks like the perfect place to me," Tobes said. "For murder."

J cringed at the thought. Just as he thought, Tobes was like a suspect in his prime. He would know about these underworld matters. But the place was closed for winter. He doubted it was open for business any time of the year.

Tobes crashed down practically every door in the place. Naturally, it was the last place they found Holly and some dude that Tobes said he knew. Of course, it took a good thirty minutes before the ambulance and the police arrived. 

It was all so chilling, physically and emotionally. He called Stevie who then called Carrie and they all met up at the hospital.