breaking in

 "You don't have an extra key?" Holly's toothy grin was much more of a grimace.

"It's in my underwear drawer," Carrie said as they made their way around the back of her parents' home that was now Devon's and obviously not hers since she was too much of a lesbian for him. 

"Damn girl, you're supposed to keep it under a rock, you know, next to the front door," Holly told her.

"Obviously." Carrie doubted Holly noticed she was cynical. At least, Devon wasn't here and she could easily get in through her bedroom window. "I'll just pick up a few things, and my key." Sure it was trespassing, but it wasn't like he had a warrant out for her either. He had given her little time to pack. She'd completely forgotten about the extra key because he had demanded the one on her key chain. As far as he was concerned he never ever wanted to see her again.

Finally, after lifting herself up from the bricks she managed to open the window and pushed in the screen. "Maybe you could wait here. I won't take long." Of course, she wanted to stay the moment she saw her lovely pink room filled with all sorts of K-pop posters. If only she could walk away from this world and into some pure pop, but that was only a fantasy. 

Carrie nursed her bottom lip trying to decide what she really needed. Of course, she immediately went to her underwear drawer and in a box of cheap bobbles, there was the key waiting for the taking. 

She tried not to think of things he said. She knew he only wanted her to feel guilty and the worst daughter in the world. "What would mom and dad think if they knew their little girl wasn't normal?"

Carrie pressed her lips tight wishing she could be someone they were proud of. Of course, Devon could never do anything wrong, even if he was drunk so much of the time when he was back in high school. But he was popular. He was on the football team. He was going to be somebody. But he hadn't amounted to much. He couldn't keep his grades up and fell into a bad crowd.

She shivered at the thought of what he might be up to. She knew he had to be up to no good. Even if he was the one who wanted her to feel she was nothing.

Carrie pushed makeup and little trinkets into an empty backpack that grew to two. She found her favorite toys. But she wondered now if she'd ever grow up. Maybe he'd been right about her all along. Maybe this was a new door opening for her.

Carrie sighed. She hoped Holly wouldn't stay mad at her. Finally, she tossed out the backpacks and tried her best to leave the way she came. Although, it was a struggle trying to get the window closed. She might just have to visit again, but next time, she would come through the front door.